Open Studio Tour

Last weekend I dragged the hubs and the youngest to a small studio tour in Frisco. We have attended the White Rock lake Studio tour in the past, and thoroughly enjoyed it. So when I saw that Frisco was having one, I jumped at the chance to see studios that were a little closer to home.

Having said that, we only made it to two stops on the tour...not because we weren't impressed, but because, that was all it took for me to get my creative cup filled... I'm still inspired....

Our first stop was Gallery 8690.
This is a cool space. Out front we found a vintage VW van....swooning over this beautiful machine does not really explain my love....Latte colored exterior and white seats...a striped awning off the side with doors open  and outdoor lounge area....yes, I swooned just a little bit...

And THEN we went inside the actual gallery....

Inside, we found amazing vintage couches and chairs....the furniture alone is eye candy.... There was a royal Blue lounge that i can't erase from my mind...in fact i'm rearranging my furniture and choosing which pieces to discard just entertaining the idea of my decor because of that couch...

The next thing we noticed was the artwork...i wish i could remember the artist's name now...but it was everywhere, and the color made me want to bust out my own paints and just have fun...

Then i noticed the musical instruments, the stage, and how the furniture was lined up...Turns out this gallery is also a church....and all i can say to that is "wow"...

Music, Art,  and vintage furniture ...honestly, for me, that alone is my church...seriously... just being in that space is holy....

We left there when my heart just felt too overwhelmed with it all and i just needed the break of space in finding the next studio to reset and clear my own emotional space.

Our next and, turned out to be, last stop, was the private home studio of Misty Oliver Foster.

The first thing we noticed was the amazing tree in the front yard...(we're tree people...we rate trees by how awesome they would be to climb...hers is awesome...) The next thing is her cool garden and walkway. Paintings are displayed on the outside of her studio, brightly colored chairs, her great yard, and then, when you think you have seen it all....you go into the studio....

Her studio is a renovated garage with a screened in porch and an extended deck...inside it is nothing but pure inspiration... from her disco ball suspended and turning from a vintage record player, to her counter top where friends and other artists are hanging out...

In Misty's Studio I just wanted to sit down and hang out all afternoon. and just take in the creative air from her beautiful paintings, art journals, and drawings, to her wall of inspiration. Yeah, i could just park it there and not leave...And it doesn't hurt that Misty is just as warm and friendly as her studio...

Misty was awesome enough to also have two other artists' showing their work there as well. One of which, Carolyn M. Nelson, was working on one of her portraits as we took in all of the creativity surrounding us. I love her portraits...bright colors...large scale...zoomed in....love them...and can i just say she is cool as can be?


After this visit, i just needed time to process..that's my thang...i need time to think about what i have going on in my cabeza.... so we found a super cute local-owned restraunt, had some amazing barbacoa and lengua tacos, Orchata, and juevos rancheros, and processed....

Here it is, over a week later...and I am still buzzing from the inspiration....and wondering..."why don't we have something like that in my town?"

There are several artists, in my neighborhood ALONE....

And now my wheels are turning....

a month without a certain social media app on my phone

I took a social media app off my phone last month...

Why would I do that?

Because i'm tired...and it's really my own fault...

I was tired of reading updates like a zombie...while I certainly enjoy keeping up with dear friends...unfortunately I had allowed my news feed to be overwhelmed by so much more than that..

Last year during election season I went through and changed all of my settings so I would not have to be bombarded with all of the negative talk that, unfortunately, so many people were spewing out...I just couldn't look at it anymore...

So, I just moved anything negative out of sight...out of sight out of mind...
(but that's not REALLY true is it? out of sight isn't REALLY out of mind)

 So in the last year I upped my news feed to only carry motivational websites, or things that inspired me. I honestly get a lot of information from groups I have joined and have learned a great deal about autoimmune disease. For this, I am very grateful.(There is an upside!)

But somehow the negative still gets in. Especially when we allow it. So, I took another baby step. I took the app off my phone. The hope was that it just won't bombard me all day long. 24/7... Here is what happened, so far....

1. People disappeared...The first weird thing is that it wiped out half of my phone contacts. Which is fine. I didn't actually use them. But it also forced me to look at my contacts and make sure I actually knew whose phone number was whose. Some of my contacts where directly linked to this app. NOT SMART!...once a little embarrassing texting of "who is this?" and whatnot was taken care of...all was well in the world.

2. A real phone....Another thing this brought to my attention, is that once certain social media apps were off my phone...i didn't actually use my phone much at all...seriously....my phone, became an actual PHONE....GASP!...i know, weird huh?

3. My world became smaller... when I DO use my phone, it is only for keeping in touch with a very small group of people. (my very closest of friends and family, which is approximately 10, maybe 15 people...) which, call me crazy...is really all a person needs to keep in touch with 24/7...and even then, i'm not so sure...

4.Conversations became real again....the same thing happened when we stopped using cable....we, in fact haven't had cable t.v. in 6 years (?) the first thing i noticed is just how much people talk about the commercials or shows they watched. It became very clear jut how little people actually had real conversations about actual life and how much people escaped into their t.v.'s....once we no longer had cable, i realized that some people didn't know how to have a real conversation...it was very surreal...the same thing has happened again once i took social media off the phone. now, instead of talking about what show they watched or the commercial they enjoyed, people talk about what other people post...sometimes it is informative...and i do appreciate that aspect...but sometimes it is just another form of escapism...

5. I was able to think: being bombarded all the time with updates and such was just squelching my creativity and overwhelming my circuits. That's just how I am. I can only take in so much "stuff" and then i need time to process and sort and create....if i am in constant "input" mode i rarely am able to create which is "output" mode for me...


conclusion:

just like anything else...it's about balance, i suppose....we live in a time where social media is just what people use to communicate...but sometimes, we need to pull our head up from the screen, look around, get some fresh air, clear our minds, and breathe....

why i took a hiatus from art shows and sales

 So, I have gone through spells in the past where i just felt really out-of-it as far as making art. I suppose it was one of those existential moments or something.

But this time...it isn't...this time i'm taking a break from making art and participating in shows for a few concrete reasons...

1. Because I haven't been making the work i really want to make....In a way i sold out my soul...not because anyone made me feel like i had to...but because i felt like i had to...as in, i had to make work that was "salable, commercial" well at least compared to what i really have in my heart...i've spent a lot of time seeing what artists i admire are doing and seem to be doing to sell their work on a regular basis...so, i tried to do the same...the result, was mediocre work that i did not believe in at all...it wasn't sincere...it wasn't "me"...it was just stuff....it[wasn't awful stuff...it just wasn't sincere...and it wasn't me...

2.Going to art shows and sales is exhausting....physically, emotionally, spiritually...it involves heavy lifting, packing and unpacking, social interaction (which is exhausting by itself for an extreme introvert like myself) and is always a huge gamble....you may or may not have a good crowd who may or may not be buying and may or may not be interested in your work... it is a potshot at best...there seem to be artists who are great at this kind of thing. I admire their ability to shmooze customers, their salesmanship, their ability to do business...that isn't me...when i leave a show i need a week to get over it...it is physically like i got hit by the flu every single time...which affects not only me but my entire family...which makes it not worth my effort simply based on this alone...

3. Not a money maker: so, as i said, there are artists and artisans who are amazing at making moo-laa at art shows. There are a lot who have also confessed that for them, going to art shows is really just a way of advertising yourself and not about making money at all. I totally get that. I think it is a great way to look at it.  For a person like myself who does not want to talk all the time, or explain for the millionth time what a piece means...(yeah, i know that is a bad attitude...sorry, but it is true...) going to art shows has to be a money maker, otherwise it just isn't worth all of the effort....i came to the conclusion that the amount of stress+effort/energy going out+time consumed did NOT equal the non existent money coming in...in fact i was lucky to break even... i also figured out that i actually brought more money into the family coffers simply by being a substitute yoga teacher...and if you teach yoga...you know just how little that is and due to my limited amount of time i am available...it is even less than it could be...

So, these three things alone are why I took a break from participating in art shows...

I could share some of my stress inducing nightmare stories ,but i won't...the three reasons i listed are nightmares enough...

I have had several artist friends asking me when I will be "back".  I'm not sure. There are a few shows i'm looking at.  Maybe this month...maybe never. I really have no idea, right now.As ever, I'm still processing. It might change tomorrow. Who knows? I certainly don't.  I just going with the flow of life and seeing where I land right now...

processing the information and life

So it has been over  a month since I have even  attempted to get something on the blog. (however, not for lack of want to) I just do this....go through spells of needing to process...or maybe just spells of "life"....it's what I do...I'm obviously not trying to use my blog to make money...that is laughable. in the rules of social media and blogging I am certain I have lost the three readers I had...such is life...peace and blessings to all...(i can't say I blame them).

I have been trying to keep this blog going for a few years now, and to be honest, it has been a struggle...not because of blogging, but, simply because, despite trying to step it up a bit, it hasn't been fully authentic...it has not  been my real voice...I've been holding back...a LOT...and that has just been boring for me...probably for whomever has stumbled upon it as well...it has been some weird, cleaned up, combed hair, version of my writing, that quite honestly...bores the crap out of me...and we all know what it is like to go to work on something we do not enjoy...

Why would I do that?

Why does anyone hold back on who, what they really are?

I suppose for me, the reason to hold back has always been the same thing...protection...and.... fear..

Protection from what?
Fear of what?

What people i know may think...
What people i know may feel entitled to say....
Negative backlash...

You know...that stuff we all worry about...(and for those who don't, I truly envy you on so many levels)

Some people are better at handling that stuff....I openly admit I feel it...sometimes too much...
It is a blessing at times, and a curse at others....and sometimes I just have to go into protection mode to process it all...

That is what I have been doing for a while now...processing....I keep reading that this is a trait common in introverts...which I have known I was my entire life....I used to feel bad about needing time to decompress and process, because it wasn't convenient for others or others who did not need time to process did not understand this...now...I don't care...it is just part of who I am...and I love processing...

But back to the point....well,I suppose that is the point...I have spent this last month, mulling a few things over....

I haven't done any artwork...

I took everything out of my Etsy Shop...(the place where i was trying to sell artwork made from an unauthentic place)

I took certain social media apps off my phone.

I changed my social media settings so that I no longer saw all of the negative updates.

I limited my social media activity.

I upped my yoga practice.

I upped my REAL book reading...not virtual books...real books that I hold in my hands and keep by my bed in a tall stack....(seriously people, you need to read real books)

I upped the care of my spiritual side, indulging in classes, museums, and community with others who are on similar journeys ....

And as a result, I have come to realize that I'm just going through a cyclical phase....one that involves hiding my true nature....trying to be what others want me to be....or retreating when I feel negativity....which results in built up feelings of resentment and eventually explodes into some form of expression: usually artwork, writing, some sort of rebellious hair colour, etc.

Life is weird....people are weird...retreating and hiding our true nature is unhealthy, not only for our spirit but shows up in the physical as well...and one of the reasons I struggle with my autoimmune issues...which i have learned could possibly be the result of pinned up  expression....the closing of the throat chakra, and keeping everything inside.

Sometimes we just need a break.... a break from anything negative....or sometimes we just need to completely break up....in order to preserve our health and well-being....

I'm fortunate to have a spouse who completely supports and fully encourages and inspires me, emotionally, spiritually, and creatively. I realized the other day, on my way to a local Wellness Expo, that he encouraged me to go to, that I was the luckiest woman in the world. I mean, I knew this already....but was reminded of this as I was driving there, wishing he could go with me, not because I didn't want to go by myself, but because I just really like hanging out with him. He's just really awesome.

So, instead of making some weird, over rated declaration  that this blog will be: blah blah (insert declaration here).....I'm just going to go forward and see what happens...and attempt to not be fearful.

There are always going to be Debbie Downers, Nay-Sayers, and those who want to poke wholes in your thoughts, theories, or ideas.or simply burst your bubble and try to put you in your place...you know what I call those people..".jerks"....and "not my friend"...."people I will no longer associate with"...life is too short to endure negative people....no matter who they are....those who resonate with you will rise to the top...those who don't will fall away....this is my mantra....

Living in a state of fear is just not healthy.